We move on throughout 2013:
April:
Dead Man Down: An action-thriller starring Colin Farrell, Noomi Rapace, Dominic Cooper, and Terence Howard. Sweet.
The Heat: An action-comedy with Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock. Maybe.
42: A documentary sports-drama starring Harrison Ford, Christopher Meloni, etc. Bad-ass.
Disconnect: A crime film starring comedian Jason Bateman, Alexander Skarsgard, etc.
Evil Dead: A remake? What the FUCK?!!!!! Well, the screenplay is written by Sam Raimi and others. Maybe.
Scary Movie 5: WHAT???!!!! After 8 years, they don't understan this franchise is dead? It's starring former Disney star Ashley Tisdale, this is bad. And there was already another horror movie parody set around the same release date called A Haunted House, from the original creators of this series, with the same subject of parody: found footage movies.
Oblivion: A sci-fi action film with Tom Cruise, Morgan Freeman, Zoe Bell, Olga Kurylenko, and no-names. Worse than Scary Movie 5?
May:
Iron Man 3: FUCK YEAH!!!!! Based on the legendary "Extremis" comic book arc, with Iron Man's archnemesis The Mandarin as the villain. Once again, FUCK YEAH!!!!
Identity Thief: A comedy with Jason Bateman, John Cho, Melissa McCarthy, Jon Favreu, etc.
Star Trek 2: Fuck Yeah! After 4 years of waiting, it's finally here! Yeah!!
Epic: A family, comedy, adventure-fantasy film starring Beyonce, Colin Farrell, Amanda Seyfried, Johnny Knoxville, Josh Hutcherson, and more. Uhh, I don't know.
Fast Six: The sixth, yes, SIXTH, in the Fast and Furious franchise. I'm not sure, I liked the last one, even though it can be nonsensical and annoying.
The Hangover Part III: WTF?? The first was hilarious, the second mediocre, now what's this gonna be like. Hopefully not another rehashing.
June:
After Earth: A sci-fi film directed by M. Night Shyamaln, trying to recover from Lady in the Water and The Last Airbender. Starring, uggh, Jaden Smith, Will Smith, etc. Bad.
The End of the World: A comedy with an ensemble cast, including Seth Rogen, James Franco, Danny McBride, Emma Watson, Jonah Hill, Jason Segel, Paul Rudd, Michael Cera, Rihanna, and Jay Baruchel. Directed by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg. FUCK. YES.
Man of Steel: A reboot of the series, directed by 300, and Watchmen director Zack Snyder, and produced by Christopher Nolan. Fuck Yeah!!
Monsters University: Finally, after 12 years, is the prequel to the highly acclaimed Monsters, Inc. it's abut the beloved characters in college. I'm not sure, a good movie, or cheap cash cow? We'll see.
World War Z (originally to be released in December 2012): Fuck yeah!! The highly anticipated adaptation of Max Brooks, son of Mel Brooks, zombie-themed action-horror novel. Starring Brad Pitt and others. Yes!!!
The Intership: A comedy from Shawn Levy and Vince Vaugh, starring Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Rose Byrne, and others. Maybe it'll be good. Maybe.
R.I.P.D.: An action-horror-comedy starring Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Bacon, Jeff Bridges, etc. Maybe.
July:
Despicable Me 2: No introduction, it'll be good, or just okay. I'm not sure.
Independence Day 3D re-release: WHY???
Grown Ups 2: What. The. Fuck. Why??????????
Pacific Rim: A sci-fi action film directed by Guillermo Del Toro, starring Charlie Hunnam, Ron Perlman, Idris Elba, Willem Dafoe, and Charlie Day. Fuck yes.
Jurassic Park 3D: WHY?
Turbo: A Dreamworks film about super-fast racing snails, starring Ryan Reynolds, Paul Giamatti (?), Michael Pena, Bill Hader (?), Richard Jenkins, Ken Jeong, Michelle Rodriguez, Kurtwood Smith, Snoop Dogg, and Samuel L. Jackson ???? What the hell?
Phineas and Ferb: WTF?? One of the few Disney shows I don't think is that bad, and they have to ruin it, don't they?
The Wolverine: A sequel to the mediocre X-Men Origins film, set in Japan or somehwere around there. Cool.
The Smurfs 2: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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